{"id":31667,"date":"2020-09-15T12:00:00","date_gmt":"2020-09-15T16:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thinkorange.com\/how-to-help-elementary-schoolers-develop-friendship\/"},"modified":"2024-04-29T11:01:52","modified_gmt":"2024-04-29T15:01:52","slug":"how-to-help-elementary-schoolers-develop-friendship","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thinkorange.com\/blog\/how-to-help-elementary-schoolers-develop-friendship\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Help Elementary Schoolers Develop Friendship"},"content":{"rendered":"

By the time kids hit upper elementary, they begin to realize their first major crisis: <\/span>Friendship.<\/b><\/p>\n

Kids wonder if they have any friends and if their peers will accept them. To avoid rejection, they consider changing who they are no matter the cost.<\/span><\/p>\n

This isn\u2019t just something that happens to our fourth and fifth graders. Believe it or not, <\/span>research is beginning to show that by kindergarten many kids are testing the power of their influence and seeking connections with friends at any cost.<\/b><\/p>\n

Meaning, there\u2019s a very small window of time where kids can learn how to become friends before they actually have friends. As soon as they become aware there are other people in the world besides themselves, they start making decisions based on the sort of friends they want to attract.<\/span><\/p>\n

So there\u2019s a bit of a problem. We\u2019re teaching kids how to be friends while they\u2019re already experiencing their first taste of friendship. This would be like training for your first marathon while you\u2019re running it. You might get a lucky mile here and there, but overall the race won’t end well without some serious help.<\/span><\/p>\n

Here are a few ways you can help your elementary kids<\/a> develop friendships.<\/b><\/p>\n

Develop self-confidence.<\/b><\/h3>\n

When a child is self-confident, they\u2019re less likely to find identity in their friends. Help them find their identity in who God made them to be. Not in what they can do or who thinks they\u2019re cool.<\/span><\/p>\n

Widen the circle.<\/b><\/h3>\n

Eventually, parents will face a time when their kids won\u2019t want to talk to them about friendship issues. This is where small groups come into play. Kids need a trusted leader who they can turn to when life gets hard. Encourage SGLs to model friendship in their groups. Cultivate an environment where kids feel like they have a tribe who gets them and likes them. <\/span>Church should always be a place where kids find friendship.<\/b><\/p>\n

Ask questions.<\/b><\/h3>\n

You can\u2019t influence kids if you don\u2019t understand their point of view. Ask them open-ended questions about what it\u2019s like to be a friend to other kids at school or church. Talk through the issues that come up and give practical suggestions to help solve them. They may even find comfort in hearing other kids\u2019 stories and realizing they\u2019re not alone.<\/span><\/p>\n

Don\u2019t freak out.<\/b><\/h3>\n

As you create a safe environment where kids can be themselves, they\u2019ll feel comfortable opening up about what\u2019s happening with friendships at home or school. They may tell you something that makes you want to run screaming to their parents. But here\u2019s the thing. Every time they tell you something like that, they\u2019re wondering how you\u2019ll respond. Responding with grace and truth without freaking out will build trust. That trust will encourage them to come to you the next time they\u2019re facing something difficult.<\/span><\/p>\n

For more ideas on how to help kids develop friendship, read this article<\/a> from Parent Cue!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By the time kids hit upper elementary, they begin to realize their first major crisis: Friendship.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":41598,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"content-type":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[90],"tags":[97,98,229,230,231,232,61],"authors":[233],"life-stage":[64],"class_list":["post-31667","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-child-development","tag-childrens-ministry","tag-elementary","tag-elementary-friendship","tag-friendship","tag-how-to-help-kids-develop-friendship","tag-kids-friends","tag-parents","authors-dan-scott","life-stage-kids-ministry"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nHow to Help Elementary Schoolers Develop Friendship | Think Orange<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Every kid needs to know how to make connections with their peers. 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